Carpet Diem
I pulled up some carpet in a house we were renovating today, it was covered in three years worth of rat terds.
Fish man really pisses me off slash creeps me out. I repsect the guy for stealing George's (evicted former co-worker) clothing and I respect him even more realizing now that George is related to him somehow. George and his girlfriend are looking for all of us that cleaned out their apartment to "kick our asses". However, the Fish Man has these buggy eyes and I can't understand a fucking word he says, which is probably for the better ebcause today I caught the phrase "ramming it in ehr ear" out of one of his conversation's with Terry. Fish Man and Terry talk back to the singers on the radio. We listen to smooth R&B all day long. The singer will lament her lost love, Terry will call back it is because she did not make certain orifices available. Today a fattie hoochie passed on the street that Fish Man and Terry found the need to shout at. They turned as she looked and unluckily for this guy, I was in the right hand window, closest to her. Conversation that followed:
Fish Man: Scale of 1 to 5?
Terry: I give her 8. Got to give her at least 8. Not a 10 by my reckonin'
Fish Man: Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeell no.
In the tradition of the Sound of Music, here are a few of the Fish Man's favorite things:
Watching me work, loitering, watching Terry work, incorrectly and incoherently telling me what to do, drinking, eating turkey legs, drinking wine, stealing homeless men's clothing, borrowing money, stopping everything he is doing and everyone else is doing to tell a terrible joke, discussing other's sex lives, mispronouncing my name, turning up the radio, taking breaks, shouting the following phrases instead of working "whoooooooooeya", "well I'll....", "hoo doggies", "aaaaaalright". FUCKING GET TO WORK FISH MAN! Yeah, I said it, I hate the fucking Fish Man. I know a lot of people piss and moan about the incompetent people they work with, and I totally hear that, you are completely right to complain. Let me explain for a moment that most of you get the pleasure of working with professional grade idiots. they thrive in an office environment where their stupidity can be masked and they can survive on crumbs for years with basic minimal social and business skills. My associates on the other hand, have ZERO other life skills or redeeming factors. NONE. They are at the core a waste of resources and human life and everyone's time. I understand the conservative social position after spending summers in these positions.
Fish man really pisses me off slash creeps me out. I repsect the guy for stealing George's (evicted former co-worker) clothing and I respect him even more realizing now that George is related to him somehow. George and his girlfriend are looking for all of us that cleaned out their apartment to "kick our asses". However, the Fish Man has these buggy eyes and I can't understand a fucking word he says, which is probably for the better ebcause today I caught the phrase "ramming it in ehr ear" out of one of his conversation's with Terry. Fish Man and Terry talk back to the singers on the radio. We listen to smooth R&B all day long. The singer will lament her lost love, Terry will call back it is because she did not make certain orifices available. Today a fattie hoochie passed on the street that Fish Man and Terry found the need to shout at. They turned as she looked and unluckily for this guy, I was in the right hand window, closest to her. Conversation that followed:
Fish Man: Scale of 1 to 5?
Terry: I give her 8. Got to give her at least 8. Not a 10 by my reckonin'
Fish Man: Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeell no.
In the tradition of the Sound of Music, here are a few of the Fish Man's favorite things:
Watching me work, loitering, watching Terry work, incorrectly and incoherently telling me what to do, drinking, eating turkey legs, drinking wine, stealing homeless men's clothing, borrowing money, stopping everything he is doing and everyone else is doing to tell a terrible joke, discussing other's sex lives, mispronouncing my name, turning up the radio, taking breaks, shouting the following phrases instead of working "whoooooooooeya", "well I'll....", "hoo doggies", "aaaaaalright". FUCKING GET TO WORK FISH MAN! Yeah, I said it, I hate the fucking Fish Man. I know a lot of people piss and moan about the incompetent people they work with, and I totally hear that, you are completely right to complain. Let me explain for a moment that most of you get the pleasure of working with professional grade idiots. they thrive in an office environment where their stupidity can be masked and they can survive on crumbs for years with basic minimal social and business skills. My associates on the other hand, have ZERO other life skills or redeeming factors. NONE. They are at the core a waste of resources and human life and everyone's time. I understand the conservative social position after spending summers in these positions.
2 Comments:
Can you at least get a good laugh out of these folks? Part of me wants to be thankful that the shits I work with aren't as bad as yours.
Amen, hermano.
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